Weeee…. Melly has finally popped last week. Congratulations to Mel & Izad. Since both myself and Nan took leave on Wednesday, we decided to drop by and visit them before continuing with our raya preps. Both of them did not want to know the gender of their baby and most of us were guessing if it’s gonna be a boy or a girl and I guessed right. Assalamualaikum and welcome to the world Nur ‘Aafeena. Both me and Nan have this thing that we dare not carry newborn babies, coz we are afraid of how fragile they can be, especially their neck area and I tend to feel awkward when trying to carry them. Melly and Izad were persuading me to try and carry her and I did. Achievement unlock! :p

I am really really so happy for them but when I carried ‘Aafeena, tears just streamed down. I looked at Nan and I could see that he was trying to hold it back as well. I think I placed them in a spot and no one said anything. I felt really really bad for crying. I don’t know what came over me but after I gave her back to Izad, Nan carried her and then I stood next to Mel trying to laugh it off and wiping away the tears. She just squeezed my hand. It was unspoken of but I think they knew why. I felt bad and WhatsApp Mel after I left to apologize again.

After we left the ward, I broke down in the car. I felt bad for feeling how I felt. I am happy but sad at the same time. Nan didn’t know how to console me. We just left things just like that and eventually tried to change the topic and continued with getting the house done for raya.

Sadness aside, I know I can’t wait to meet her again when we go raya visiting with the group. 🙂